From Broken to Blessed: Why Sometimes Life's Worst Moments Lead to Your Best Chapters

My Experiences and How to Start Your Next Chapter Right

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Some days, I wonder what life would be like if my former life hadn’t been ripped away from me.

Would I still be married to my ex? Would we have ever had another kid? Would we still be in ministry, moving from state, church to church, wherever we were needed?

My trips down memory lane are usually triggered by my now-husband asking questions about what life in ministry was like. What was seminary like? What kind of things did your church do for the community? Did they sing the same songs as other denominations?

(I once dreamed that he followed me back into ministry, bringing my adulthood full circle.)

Other times, the memories are triggered by seeing old friends and former seminary classmates on Facebook, still living the life that was planned for them almost 15 years ago.

That melancholy feeling only lasts for a moment though, and then I’m back into reality, basking in the life that I have now.

Do I envy them? No, not really. Maybe their ability to maintain a marriage free from adultery, or major crimes. You know, the things that my ex did that ruined everything we had.

But in my own way, I am grateful for the initial events that set me down a new path. And every major change that altered my course since then.

Fear for the Next Chapter

I remember back when I filed for divorce, how worried I was.

• How would I provide for my kids?

• Would I be able to be a single parent?

• Would I ever find love again?

• Would said person treat me well and protect our marriage?

I knew I was damaged. Broken mentally, emotionally, spiritually. And I believed no one would possibly want someone with baggage. A “history”. Or even someone with kids.

As a result, I chose the wrong people to commit to a couple of times, ignoring the red flags, putting myself in a position of harm and even more damage.

All while raising two kids and working hard to provide.

Forging a New Path is Never Easy

It wasn’t an easy road. I didn’t step right into a fruitful, easy, loving life. The path was filled with stress, working my way up the career ladder, failed relationships and pain. But every time I stumbled or hit a roadblock, the detour was worth it.

And now? My new life is nothing like I ever thought it would be. In a lot of ways, it’s so much better.

A new husband and stepfather for my daughters (who are now both basically adults). Two step kids of my own with many years of childhood left. A strong career. An even stronger marriage. A home we love and make many memories in.

Everyone says that time flies, but no one understands it deeply as those who have lost it all and begun a new life.

You Hold the Pen

For now, you may not understand what your next chapter in life will hold. All you know is that it’s going to be completely different.

And that’s ok.

It’s your chapter to write.

It’s up to you how your life turns out, and whether or not you spiral downward or thrive.

If you’re about to start a whole new chapter in life, remember this:

1. You can choose what comes next in your life

2. Make every effort to become a better version of YOU

3. Never settle for people that don’t see your value

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