Why You Should Build Resiliency Before You Need It
And How To Get Started
My husband is a prepper. He has the Bugout-Bag and everything, ready to evacuate the moment anything catastrophic happens. Tornados, war, terrorist attacks - he’s ready. The only thing he lacks is a shelter in the basement. (Now that I’ve spoken it into existence, it’ll probably be on his to-do list.)
And even though I believe that we’ll probably never need the things he has prepared, I’m grateful we have it, just in case. There are so many people in the world that aren’t prepared for anything. They don’t have a will. They lack a savings account. They don’t even have jumper cables in their trunk. They are completely unprepared for something to go wrong in life.
Usually when we think of preparing for the worst, it’s all about money and income, food and water, so-on-and-so-forth. But we don’t think about preparing ourselves mentally and emotionally.
Resilience is the last thing on our mind
We usually only build it by forcing ourselves through traumatic experiences. But not everyone is strong enough to make it through.
A lot of people spiral and never seem to recover from the worst. Financial downfall, divorce, a difficult doctor diagnosis, or anything tragic, and their world comes crashing down.
I know a woman who never recovered from divorce. She was the one that never wanted to work, believed her husband would always be there to take care of things financially, and never tried to better herself.
Unfortunately, she made the grave mistake of cheating on her husband and losing everything.
Fast forward to years later, she has never tried to get a better job than working as a cashier or delivering groceries. And even being a cashier was too much for her.
Not because she isn’t capable, but because she just doesn’t feel like she should have to get up early to work or follow anyone’s schedule.
She’s smart enough and capable to achieve so much more, but her entitlement and her emotional and financial abuse of others keeps her held back.
And her life just keeps spiraling.
Stop the spiraling before it starts
As with anything else in life, you should start building your resilience before you need it.
Preparing your mind now will help you be strong enough to make it through whatever life throws at you.
Here are three ways that you can start today. While it may seem like these exercises are only for those that are in the middle of a crisis, the truth is, you need to prepare yourself mentally before the worst scenarios happen.
Reframe Your Mindset Day-by-Day
Look at existing problems as opportunities to change your situation rather than allowing yourself to be a helpless victim. If it’s something that you truly can’t change, then focus on the things that you can change.
Whenever I’ve been in a job that was soul sucking, I used it as a sign that I needed to find somewhere better for me. I reached a point where changing the situation inside the job was not possible, so I focused on what I could do: revamping my resume, searching for jobs that I could mostly do and that I wanted to do, and applying.
Look at current detours as necessary to get you to a better destination. Right now it may suck to have to deal with whatever is holding you back, but you never know what’s coming just around the corner.
For example, I dated a man who destroyed my self-confidence, but if I hadn’t wasted time with him, I would have never found my now-husband who is truly the best thing to ever happen to me (other than my kids, naturally).
Actionable, Bitesize Goals
Make some small goals that are actionable and achievable, and make it happen. Don’t get so focused on lofty, 5-year-goals that cause you to give up before you start. Make a goal for this week, or even for today, and knock it out.
Every single journey starts with one small step in the right direction. Make a goal, find an action, make a decision, and do it.
Your problems won’t just disappear. In fact, ignoring them will usually make things worse. Do something sooner rather than later and don’t let things snowball.
Positive View of Yourself
Build a positive image of yourself. Not just in character or in physical appearance, but in your abilities and your worth as well.
Write down all the problems and challenges that you’ve overcome in a notebook. Reflect on all the times that you were able to overcome. Every time you solve something, write it down.
Pretty soon, you’ll start to believe in yourself more and will look at challenges as not so difficult.
Believe you are capable of more and push yourself beyond your self-imposed limitations. Don’t let thoughts like, “I can’t, I shouldn’t have to, I won’t, I’m too good for that” be the thoughts that keep you stuck in your current situations.
You can make a change. You can improve your circumstances and your future. You can overcome anything life throws at you.
Takeaways
You don’t have to wait until the worst happens to prepare yourself.
Reframe your mindset so that you don’t view future challenges as the end of it all.
Take small steps towards small goals so that when larger challenges and goals become necessary, you are mentally prepared to take action and succeed.
Build a positive view of yourself so that you fully believe in what you can do when **** hits the fan.
If you know someone that would benefit from this post, please do share! :)
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